26 August 2008
Radical
Another beautiful day. Perfict, actually (for delaware at least). I think I'm planning to go to a nice coffee shop again today on Main St. to study the Word and my Nursing material. I did that yesturday, and it worked pretty well. I didn't get to talk to anyone about my faith yet, but I'm hoping the Lord will open up opportunities. I'm tired of being a selfish, lazy Christian. It's time to get fired up for the Lord! Radical!
25 August 2008
strong hold
Day 11 of being stuck at home trying to figure out what I'm going to do with my life. My parents sat me down for yet another interrogation last night. I feel stuck. And my parents just don't understand. Every time I venture to express my feelings and perhaps seek some advice from my all-too-wise parents, it turns into a bad idea. So, I'm just keeping things to myself...which of course they don't like.
So, This is me, Deb, floating through life, simply existing right now. No plan; no purpose. Surviving rather than thriving.
I am trusting God, but each passing day is harder. Sometimes I just don't want to get up in the morning. And I'm bored, but I'm avoiding the things I know I should be doing.
Seems like I need a healthy dose of discipline. Something that, for me, is extremely difficult to aquire. Just do it! Yeah, well, I wish it were that easy. Motivation is definitly something that I struggle with. Appathy sets in quickly and starts attacking ferociously.
And.... my will to persevere decreases rapidly.
Christ is my only stronghold. Where would I be without Him?
Dead, probably.
Without my God, there would truly be no point in going on.
Now that I am done my self-pity rant, I need to turn all focus to the ONE who has saved me from phyisical, spiritual, and eternal death. HE alone has power over the world and the evil forces that inhabit it. HE alone could save me by sacrificing Himself for my wrong-doings. And HE alone is to be exhalted.
May hasatan, the enemy be crushed under the feet of the Savior, Yeshua forever. he is so small and insignificant. he lies and cheats for his gain. may he be damned soon and very soon.
I will praise His holy name, for He alone is worthy of all praise.
He is my protector, provider and salvation.
May He be my First Love. For now and until eternity.
Baruch Ha Shem Yeshua Ha Meshach, bless the name of the Messiah, Jesus.
yeah. I'm strange. but being radical for Christ is alot more fun then being appathetic ;)
So, This is me, Deb, floating through life, simply existing right now. No plan; no purpose. Surviving rather than thriving.
I am trusting God, but each passing day is harder. Sometimes I just don't want to get up in the morning. And I'm bored, but I'm avoiding the things I know I should be doing.
Seems like I need a healthy dose of discipline. Something that, for me, is extremely difficult to aquire. Just do it! Yeah, well, I wish it were that easy. Motivation is definitly something that I struggle with. Appathy sets in quickly and starts attacking ferociously.
And.... my will to persevere decreases rapidly.
Christ is my only stronghold. Where would I be without Him?
Dead, probably.
Without my God, there would truly be no point in going on.
Now that I am done my self-pity rant, I need to turn all focus to the ONE who has saved me from phyisical, spiritual, and eternal death. HE alone has power over the world and the evil forces that inhabit it. HE alone could save me by sacrificing Himself for my wrong-doings. And HE alone is to be exhalted.
May hasatan, the enemy be crushed under the feet of the Savior, Yeshua forever. he is so small and insignificant. he lies and cheats for his gain. may he be damned soon and very soon.
I will praise His holy name, for He alone is worthy of all praise.
He is my protector, provider and salvation.
May He be my First Love. For now and until eternity.
Baruch Ha Shem Yeshua Ha Meshach, bless the name of the Messiah, Jesus.
yeah. I'm strange. but being radical for Christ is alot more fun then being appathetic ;)
22 August 2008
"Lieutenant, what's the cape for?"
"I am Captain Cab!" ~Murdock to Hannabal (The A-Team s.2, e.7)
Another beautiful day. God is good, I'm alive, and things couldn't get any better. For those of you who know my current predicament, I am truly not being sarcastic. I just know that the Lord is faithful and He knows what's best. I've just got to be obedient to Him and wait on Him.
The whole truth is, I failed the boards and I was forced to resign from my nursing home job because I am unqualified to perform as a Graduate Nurse. I also got rejected from the hospital I recently applied to. Because I don't have a job, things are kinda slow. I'm working on taking another NCLEX prep course, and I'm trying to decide what to do about applying to hospitals, and which ones to apply to. I've also been praying, spending time in the Word, and doing some much-needed cleaning in my house. I'm also meeting with all the friends that I didn't get to see this past semester, and I'm also co-planning the outreach that my church is having for incoming freshmen on August 31.
I'm jobless, and I'm about to loose the use of a car when my sister comes home from camp, but life is good. Being thrown in situations like this really causes you to rely on the only One who can truly provide peace. May all glory be granted to my God.
Another beautiful day. God is good, I'm alive, and things couldn't get any better. For those of you who know my current predicament, I am truly not being sarcastic. I just know that the Lord is faithful and He knows what's best. I've just got to be obedient to Him and wait on Him.
The whole truth is, I failed the boards and I was forced to resign from my nursing home job because I am unqualified to perform as a Graduate Nurse. I also got rejected from the hospital I recently applied to. Because I don't have a job, things are kinda slow. I'm working on taking another NCLEX prep course, and I'm trying to decide what to do about applying to hospitals, and which ones to apply to. I've also been praying, spending time in the Word, and doing some much-needed cleaning in my house. I'm also meeting with all the friends that I didn't get to see this past semester, and I'm also co-planning the outreach that my church is having for incoming freshmen on August 31.
I'm jobless, and I'm about to loose the use of a car when my sister comes home from camp, but life is good. Being thrown in situations like this really causes you to rely on the only One who can truly provide peace. May all glory be granted to my God.
20 August 2008
chapter 7
People tell me, "Oh, you are starting a new chapter in life!"
Well, I feel like someone ripped out the page, crumpled it up, stepped on it, then ran it through a shredder. Ok, maybe not that extreme.
Well anyway, I feel like I took my first step out into the 'real world', and I fell flat on my face. Nice one, Deb.
While all my friends and peers have their high paying jobs at their big-name hospitals with the stupid letters RN tacked onto the end of their names, I am actually unemployed. Yup. I said it. I quit my nursing home job...well actually I was forced to quit, but that's another story.
The point is, Last night I was ushered into a forced interrogation by my (well-meaning, I'm sure) parents who demanded that I tell them everything that's going on with my life. Ok, so I screwed up a little. I can work it out. I'm capable. Don't they see that?
Well, I feel like someone ripped out the page, crumpled it up, stepped on it, then ran it through a shredder. Ok, maybe not that extreme.
Well anyway, I feel like I took my first step out into the 'real world', and I fell flat on my face. Nice one, Deb.
While all my friends and peers have their high paying jobs at their big-name hospitals with the stupid letters RN tacked onto the end of their names, I am actually unemployed. Yup. I said it. I quit my nursing home job...well actually I was forced to quit, but that's another story.
The point is, Last night I was ushered into a forced interrogation by my (well-meaning, I'm sure) parents who demanded that I tell them everything that's going on with my life. Ok, so I screwed up a little. I can work it out. I'm capable. Don't they see that?
11 August 2008
gravidity
I just got back from one of my favorite places in the whole wide world called Camp Spofford. Unfortunitly it was raining most of the week I was up there, but I did get in my annual skiing fix (water skiing of course...I don't do snow skiing.)
***Snowboarding rules :)***
I regreted to leave Spofford, but I know I've got work here to do.
Studying for the boards, getting ready for the college outreach, and working on growing in my relationship with my God.
I am also trying to find a job. This may prove difficult since my last potential did not work out.
God will make a way, no doubt.
The Lord is good, Amen? He is so good. He is faithful and true. The Boy and I had a long talk with our pastor last night. Great guy. And his wife is a wonderful cook. We talked about everything from gold panning to the Scriptures to Israel to the end times to marriage.
I think about marriage sometimes. I wonder if the Lord actually wants me to get married. I want to get married and have kids, but what does the Lord want? And what about the man? Who will it be? Will I know I am supposed to marry him when I meet him? Will he know he's supposed to marry me?
What if he wants to marry me and I don't want to marry him? Am I picky?
Whatever. I know the Lord has a plan. I just wish I was up at Spofford instead of studying for the boards. That would make me perfictly happy.
***Snowboarding rules :)***
I regreted to leave Spofford, but I know I've got work here to do.
Studying for the boards, getting ready for the college outreach, and working on growing in my relationship with my God.
I am also trying to find a job. This may prove difficult since my last potential did not work out.
God will make a way, no doubt.
The Lord is good, Amen? He is so good. He is faithful and true. The Boy and I had a long talk with our pastor last night. Great guy. And his wife is a wonderful cook. We talked about everything from gold panning to the Scriptures to Israel to the end times to marriage.
I think about marriage sometimes. I wonder if the Lord actually wants me to get married. I want to get married and have kids, but what does the Lord want? And what about the man? Who will it be? Will I know I am supposed to marry him when I meet him? Will he know he's supposed to marry me?
What if he wants to marry me and I don't want to marry him? Am I picky?
Whatever. I know the Lord has a plan. I just wish I was up at Spofford instead of studying for the boards. That would make me perfictly happy.
01 August 2008
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